The Pie Monster

“I came as fast as I could, sweet Sourdough!” Margot V. Shadow panted, catching her breath.

“Aye! And I thank you. Was baking a pie, right? And I was out of hexed toad stool—”  “Oh no”  “—so I used a bit of cursed blaqwort.”

From the hallway’s adjoining kitchen, a caged snarl crackled through the air. Waves of eldritch energy began to radiate as the unseen force drew together, coalescing into a powerful beast.

Without another word, Margot hoisted her baker’s morning star, a formidable weapon, and marched into the kitchen. No battle cry was issued, the scant element of surprise would help win the day.

While Mayor Sourdough nervously paced in his living room, Margot battled the off-recipe pie. Sourdough dabbed at his forehead with a handkerchief, lightly relieved upon realizing the splats of ruby liquid were sauce, not blood. “Or is this the pie monster’s blood?” the politician fussed nervously. While he desperately worried if Margot would be safe, he also worried about any remaining pie… a mis-aimed bolt of lightning shattered the line of thought, however. Yelping, Sourdough dove for cover.

Margot V. Shadow battles a pie monster then eats it with Mayor K. M. Sourdough.

Margot raised her morning star high, carefully backing up. A pot lid served as a shield, defending her from the pie monster’s lashing tentacles. “Down! Into the fiery depths of the oven, I command you!”

Fangs of crust and claws of fruit lashed out, trying in vain to break through Margot’s defenses. The creature reared one of its heads back, sucking in air, preparing for a fiery attack. This was an ending moment, Margot knew. She waited for the creature to fill with energy and then leapt forward, grasping her baker’s weapon with both hands. “In the name of taste, I van-quiche you!” she roared!

Weapon met flaky, delicious, crust and rang true. The monster exploded, sending Margot flying out of the kitchen.

“Are you okay?!” Mayor Sourdough asked hurriedly, humbly, and then quietly, “did any pie survive?”

Groaning as she sat up, Margot nodded. “Enough for two plates, and I’m starving,” she grinned.

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